Persistence & Perseverance
There are times in life that will try our patience and our fortitude. Trials that beset us, frustrate us and oftentimes force us to change plans or directions and sadly at times, to say there are no options left. If we are lucky (blessed might be a better word), we learn ways to manoeuver around those obstacles and challenges.
Once again today I find myself challenged by social media, when I was informed that my ability to like or comment on people’s posts on threads was restricted. Even creating a post of my own was impossible. When I first rejoined threads in late spring, I had this same issue. I let them know that they had made an error in the little box provided and tried to figure out how to circumvent this restriction. An internet search taught me how I could still post within that restriction, and I remembered how to do that this morning. I persist because it’s what I know how to do, although I didn’t always.
I learned a great lesson about persistence from my older son, who as a child of 4 was determined to make a friend of a boy who lived across the street. Repeated rebuffs didn’t stop him from trying. He would knock on the gate at that house and be told by the other boy to go away, he didn’t want to play. Home he would come, and I’d suggest just playing around the house for a bit and within 5 minutes, off he’d go to that other house, knock on the gate to be sent home once again. I don’t recall how many tries my son made to be admitted into that backyard, but I watched each time, hoping he’d either admit defeat and find peace, or granted entry to what it was he was hoping to find. I think both of us jumped a little with joy when we saw that gate finally open.
Perseverance came to me through cancer treatment. Chemotherapy was a challenge to say the least, but I was blessed in that I was never ill and never missed treatment. The “red devil” (doxorubicin) is so toxic that it is injected into a vein in the hand by the nurse wearing protective gloves. I had 4 of that, one every 3 weeks and other than losing all my hair, no serious side effects. Taxol, after the red devil was finished was a large bottle of nasty that took almost 4 hours to drip. 4 of that once every 3 weeks. Worst side effect - intense bone pain, managed by Tylenol 3 and 2 days of remaining prone or sleeping on the couch. Neuropathy is a major side effect, and again I was blessed that mine was minor, though persists somewhat to this day. It was radiation that taught me true perseverance.
Chemotherapy didn’t upset me the way that radiation did. I needed 30 hits of that, 5 days a week for 6 weeks. The zapping lasted all of 10 minutes. But I almost quit before I even had the first one. Arriving at the Princess Margaret Hospital in Toronto for that (2 choices for radiation in the region at that time - Sunnybrook or PMH and my doctor chose PMH) was anguish. At the hospital where I had chemo, so much else was happening including babies being born. It wasn’t just about cancer. Princess Margaret is all cancer, all the time and it is an incredible facility. The fact that the machines break down all the time, all day long, means that my 4 p.m. appointment was pushed to almost 7 p.m. and as I sat there waiting with dread I nearly bolted, deciding I’d just not do radiation. In near tears, I phoned a friend who was still at her office in the area. She arrived within minutes and sat with me to keep me in that chair until my name was called. If you have a friend like that? Cherish that person. And I figured out that if I made all future appointments for first thing in the morning, the machine hasn’t had a chance to wear out. That meant getting up at an unholy hour to get to the hospital, but I did it for those 6 weeks. And the bonus was having the remainder of the day free for other things.
Being frustrated in my movements by a social media platform pales in comparison to being stopped in my tracks by a life threatening disease. There is no comparison. I can live without social media. But I’ve learned through the gift of experience that there are options and ways around difficulties and obstacles thrown in my path. The possibility to say “I’m done” and move on to something else or the possibility to keep fighting for what I know I can do or what I want. I’m like the gum stuck under a shoe. Once I’m there, I’m hard to get rid of. So, I will persist and persevere with this social media platform until the day I decide there is something better waiting for me elsewhere.